Blanket

The blanket

your mother made for you, you said

you were carrying it always with you

from one move to another

I used to see you sleeping wrapped in your blanket

whenever I came to visit

you used to work nightshifts

Was I obsessed with your body

or the domesticity in you

transmitted by your mother

through the blanket?

I was jealous of your blanket

envied the affection you received from your mother

represented in the blanket

how much I wished I had such a blanket

This obsession with a blanket

I could not received from my mother

I wanted my children carry such a blanket

and tell their lovers under the blanket

my mother made this blanket for me.

Why this obsession with the blanket?

rather than the coat also made by yur mother

I was naked under your blanket

no cloth to cover up my bare emotions and vulnerability.

Cloud-River

November 23, 2003

Montreal

Okkyung Pak